Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self. Cyril Connolly (1903 - 1974)


Monday Mingle: All about relationships

I promise I'll return to v-logging soon. I'm just not feeling up to being viewed right now. Just having a rough time.

They are very affectionate, however, princess was upset and did not wish to bestow kisses or have them bestowed upon her.

If you'd like to join in the fun, do a short vlog on your blog answering the week's questions (however many you choose), post the above button on your site and link up at Eighty MPH Mom. Visit the other participants, learn about them and have fun! Trust me, if I can do it, then you can. Look down there at the amateur :). Plus you can send in your questions to Jennifer for the next mingle. Come on jump in!

We're mixing it up a bit this week - ALL ABOUT MARRIAGE/RELATIONSHIPS:
Speedy Cop would love to see the husband/partner's answers too - either via vlog or through you!

1. Men: When your spouse asks you "how does this outfit make me look" - how do you respond?
  My husband is not going to do a vlog with me at anytime soon. I've asked him before and he asked why would he want to do that :) He is not a camera/video person. 

  Ladies:  Do you really want him to answer honestly?

I don't ask my husband this question. But if I did I'd want him to be honest and say what he thought. After all, I am dressing for him and me. He should always let me know if I should highlight the girls or fade them some etc  :)

2. Both: What is one thing you should always do to keep your spouse/partner happy? What do you do/say to avoid friction in your relationship?

1. Give him the remote or some loving. Men are pretty easy.
2. I don't appease too often so friction is around alot. We are ...I am learning how to try to get to a point of talking it out so each of us can settled a matter without going off like spitting lava and then having to nurse the wounds.  It is not easy. 

We do apologize and pray for each other alot so that's a good start right?

3.  Both: What were the first thoughts about your spouse/partner  that came to mind when you first met him/her?

I thought he was a good man because I've had the chance to know him first for over two years without dating (Good thing because it takes me a good long time to trust anyone). Then when we met, I thought he was shy and nervous and really tall :)

4.  Both:  What is your favorite physical feature of your spouse/partner?

I like his eyes. They change color alot (I guess it depends on the colors he is wearing) but they are blue. I also like his profile, he is cute and he also reminds me of Ralph Fiennes.

5. Both: What are the key ingredients to a successful marriage/relationship?

Since I...we just spoke to our Pastor asking for help. I'll give you the four things he said that we'll be trying and see how we progress. 

So if you learn to fight fair then that's apart of the success.

In my own words how I remember it...

1. Your spouse is NOT the enemy

2. It's ok to say I'm so very mad right now, but I'm committed

3. Stop and decide to go to your separate corners (carrying on with chores or life or whatever) and think about what is happening and why you are angry and then come back and try talking about it. If you get off topic, go away and calm down and come back and try again. It's worth it to work it out  without shooting each other with words which can wound for too long of a time.

4. To stay in tune with each other, so you'll know how to support your spouse in whatever they are struggling or rejoicing with. 
Sit (no distractions) and talk. You will have to practice this because not all couples are used to doing it or want to say what's inside or even know how to do it.  You can start off with just five minutes if more is too much.
It is important not to try to fix anything each other said. Just listen and encourage and talk.

Other: Date each other. I can't tell you how I yearn for dh to date me. Just me. no kids. 

Enjoy each other. Do silly, stupid stuff together and laugh. It creates bond.

Let each other be individuals and have and pursue their own goals. As long as you don't ignore each other and allow your relationship to fall by the wayside. etc etc etc

6.  Are you ready for more Speedy Cop movie quotes?   

I am ready! I want to add more movies to my 394 netflix list.

Thank you friends for coming over to share you love. I'll be visiting with y'all.

Have a great week!



The next three are excellent questions - they were submitted by LAUREN from Mis-Adventures in Theatre:

1. Someone tells you that you have the whole day off and gives you $1,000 to do as you please.  What do you do?

2. Who would play you in a Lifetime movie about yourself?

3. We're in the technology age.  What is your favorite technological innovation?  What one do you think is just useless?

4. What is your favorite funny childhood memory?

5. What is/was your favorite Kool-Aid/Jello flavor? One you hated?

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  1. I think those are excellent ideas you got - all are so important. My hubby and I are both pretty passive, which is helpful. We don't like drama (hmmm - sound familiar?), so we tend to talk mostly. If we do get annoyed, we just do our own thing for awhile, then it's better in no time. Nothing is worth getting that upset over.

    I'm sorry your hubby wouldn't vlog - I wanted to see him! But that is okay. I appreciate you answering - your answers make so much sense.

    Thank you!

  2. YEAH! First thing, hope U start feeling better so you can vlog again. my prayers are with you if you are overcoming difficulties in your life.

    Neat answers, I will show my hubby and apply then. Right on!

    Thanks for joining!

  3. Sorry you're not feeling up to vlogging. I hope you feel better soon.

    Sometimes those marital tiffs can be really distressing. I'm actually reading a book right now from a review which has a great approach to it.


  4. I can't wait to see more Vloggin Callie :)

    I loved your answers! I am glad that you got to know him 2 years before dating - you are right, that is a great way to build trust.

    And I laughed when I read your answer "give him the remote or some loving" Men really are easy - its the gals that are so difficult!
    I hope you have a wonderful week!

  5. I always love hearing your voice, you're always too cute!

    Those are some great tips!

    Hope you feel better.

  6. Aww I miss your smiling face! But I'll be patient ;)

    Your answers were quite thoughtful and honest. I appreciate that.

    How tall is your husband?

    Laughing creates a wonderful bond. :)

  7. Hope you're feeling better soon!

    You're right about dating your spouse, it is important! You should set aside at least one day per month that just the two of you can go out or sit alone together to watch a movie (one of the 394 at Netflix).

  8. yea my man isnt vlogging or blogging anytime soon either. one of the things that is pro antifriction in my household is I don't V/blog when he's around, or wear my KISS tshirt. counseling is the best and so is dating!

  9. Someday I am going to do one of these Mingles. Of course I need to get my blogging mojo back first. I have been blogged out lately.

    Don't feel bad my husband would never do something like this.

  10. AWWW... Y'all sound like y'all have a great relationship. I like this Monday Mingle thing. I might get involved next week.


  11. I loved these questions and answers!

  12. What a stinker for not playing along on the Vlog! But I hear you, I had to peer pressure mine into it as well. I agree men are pretty easy and taking the laid back way and not beating a dead horse is the way to go. I miss your beautiful face love! So sorry I have been so behind on comment love...oy this gift guide! I promise to be a better bloggy friend!



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