Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self. Cyril Connolly (1903 - 1974)


Happy Birthday Forgotten

My mother in law called the other day to wish me a happy birthday. I was quite surprised. She remembered a day that I did not even remember. Actually she is signed up to a program that reminded her, but she called.

I just now saw an email from my husband wishing me a happy birthday. It was sent a few days ago.
I don't know how  missed it.

I don't know how to feel about my birthday. I feel as if it's not really special.

I did not know my birthday as a kid. I liked January, so I told them it was January when they asked at the girls home (orphanage). Or maybe they just checked when I arrived at the orphanage and did an age approximation.

January was decided and accepted.
I received my passport in it and it became official. I was a teen and needed an ID to get a job.

Years later I finally met my mom and she said it was a different date. I figured she'd know. She is my mother. So January 1st 1980 it was. I was glad my birthday really was in January.

Then a few weeks or months later, she couldn't find my birth certificate and had to re-apply for a new copy. She said it was no longer that date. It was now a day in May.  The exact same day as my son's birthday.

Okay then.

How could I fault her. She hasn't seen me in over 20 years!

My birthday wasn't known and was never important, so a few years ago, I withdrew myself from the knowledge of it.

This is why I didn't even remember my own birthday....well the official one that dh and everyone else uses.

I remember only when others remember. That's kinda sad.

Well my mother in law thinks that I  should take a day and make it special.

I guess I'll think about it.....

Colette is a busy mom of 2 kids focusing solely on being a mom. She hails from the Caribbean and now balances the full life of being a SAHM and dabbling in odd jobs to help around the home. She enjoys sharing her memories, hopes, food, travel, entertainment, and product experiences on her blog. Please read my disclosure 
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  1. This made me tear up. There is so much emotion in your words here...I can't begin to feel what you are feeling but I do know what it feels like to not have the whole picture of who you are. I don't know who my father is. It makes me feel incomplete. However, we find ways of coping with our pains and somehow we get through. I won't tell you to forget about it or to concentrate on something else...because that doesn't really help me...I just put one foot in front the other and I march on. This is a part of me, it will always be a part of me and all I can do is just accept it. Sending warm hugs your way. xo

    1. Thank you Tami.
      It is what it is I guess. You just learn to live with it and accept and/or put away what doesn't matter as much.

      I've never known my father either. I don't cry for him as I used to when I was a child, but every now and then something irritates that sore spot in my heart and I wonder about him and cry. Sometimes I don't even remember to remember after him. After all, there are no memories of him to begin with.

      One feet in front of the other and all will work out as it should eventually.

  2. You definitely need to embrace your birthday as your day and milk it for all it's worth.

    1. I'm definitely thinking it over.
      Thanks Joyce :)

  3. It's special to other people because it's YOUR day! You deserve to have a day that's just for you!

  4. Giiiiiiiiiiiiiiirl, the day you were born the angels sang and rejoiced because they knew how special you were gonna be, you cannot begrudge them (and you) that celebration. Woot!! I'm with your mother-in-law, get those party shoes out once a year and celebrate. And happy birthday and a big sincere happy hug to you too!!! Birthdays rock, I think. :)

    1. Thank you Rosey.
      I think I shall indeed find something special to do on my day....whichever day I choose.
      Still wondering which one to stick with...

      You are so kind. :)

  5. Regardless of whether your day of birth is in January or in May, it IS a special day; it's the day that the world was gifted another extraordinary being who will bring into it much needed love, kindness, and happiness among many other things :)

    Happy, happy birthday to you Big Sis regardless of what day it is! It's YOUR special day and you should celebrate all that you've added to the world since you were born, which is a lot I might add!

    1. Thank you sis!

      I will do this. After all I wouldn't tell my kids any different if they were in my position :)


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