Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self. Cyril Connolly (1903 - 1974)


When I've Been Wounded - Forgiveness and #Music To Smile

I had surgery on Thursday.
I am home now recuperating. I am not able to drive or lift or do much for the next couple weeks.

I've been able to get the kids on the school bus, and I'm not sure what will happen during the next week, but I can feel that I am healing each day.

I hope to be up and around soon and also that my doctor will give me the go ahead. It's really tough as a parent to be down and out.

Please pray for me.


What I learned this week: 
When I've been wounded - Forgiveness
The kinds of wounds we need to idenfity and forgive are always personal, unfair and deep.

Some wounds need a bandaid and some wounds need surgery. We struggle with forgiving the deep wounds done to us.

In order to forgive some evil thing done to you. You cannot excuse it. You cannot just tolerate it. You cannot just bury or smother it. 
You have to look the evil straight in the face. You have to call it what it is. You have to let the horror of it shock and enrage you and only then can you get to forgiveness.
As Christians we try to be nice and we don't call it what it is. Which means we never fully get around to forgiveness, and we lead these subpar lives with the undercurrent of conflict.
We have to find the way of forgiveness to live freely.

2. We have to choose to forgive 
You either forgive freely or not at all.
Forgiveness is not covering it up and pretending it was no big deal, or assuming that if I leave it alone, it will get better from the "time heals all wounds" kind of idea.
Forgiveness is not excusing and understanding why people do something.
Forigiveness is NOT the same thing as trust.
You can forgive someone without welcoming them back into your life in a place of trust. You have to see change character before trust can be earned again.

The problem with forgiveness is that most of the time we do NOT feel like forgiving. Most times our feelings follow our actions. We choose to forgive. If we wait until we feel like forgiving, we'll never ever forgive those deep wounds given to us by others.

3. I have to release God's new heart inside me. 
When you trust Jesus as your saviour, Jesus moves inside you. You now have the nature of God inside you. God has given you his character so that you want what he wants. You do not have to generate it, you have to release it.
Every follower of Christ who has crossed the line of faith, and received Jesus Christ has received a heart transplant. Your old stony heart has been replaced. Your old desires are replaced with God's desires. At the deepest and truest, the most real part of you is the God part that longs for what God longs for.
You don't have to muscle up forgiveness. You need to release the God's forgiveness that is already there within you.
The deepest, truest, best part of you that God has placed there actually wants to forgive and to make it right. The reason it does is because the heart of God is about reconciliation and your heart longs for that.

4. I need to look for God's hand in my life. 
Geneses 50:20
God never wastes a wound. There is nothing that comes to you that isn't filter through his love. He did not cause it. He hates it because it's evil, but he has a way of taking that which is terrible and turning it on it's head so that it becomes something incredible. He reverses the worse.

If you have some horrible wound. God has not abandoned you. God has not forsaken you. In the darkest moments of deepest pain, God is right there. Jesus understands because he received wounds that are way deeper than ours. He gets the pain we experience and he lives inside us to enable and call you and give you the desire to forgive and be set free.
Forgiveness is not helping them, it's helping us.
Who do you need to forgive.

Welcome to today's music.  I hope Monday find you with a smile and music to begin your week with light steps. 
I'm always coming to visit everyone on the linky so don't worry if I'm a bit late! 

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“Sounds like life to Me”! 

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Colette is a busy mom of 2 kids focusing solely on being a mom. She hails from the Caribbean and now balances the full life of being a SAHM and dabbling in odd jobs to help around the home. She enjoys sharing her memories, hopes, food, travel, entertainment, and product experiences on her blog. Please read my disclosure 
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  1. Kirk Franklin's music is good for the heart (and it gets you moving). I have a big hurt I have recently forgiven. Old as I am I magically thought the other person would be kind because I'd forgiven him not being so. Silly me. But that's okay. My heart is now clear. I was holding on to the mad/hurt far too long. I hope you're feeling so so much better soon, Colette!

    1. HUGS.
      So glad you are free in the heart my love.

    2. Wishing you the same, always. :)

  2. Hope you have a speedy recovery. It is not easy having surgery and also having children to worry about. Best wishes.
    twinkle at optonline dot net

    1. Thank you Maryann.
      It's definitely something I'm trying not to worry about.
      Just doing the best I can.

  3. Collette, all very good points on how to move past the wrong done to you by another and it's hard to let go without God's hand leading the way. Take care of yourself during your recovery. I know precisely how difficult it is to be down with small ones to care for. Rest when you need to because that's when your body heals itself. Love the music! Thanks for visiting. Have an excellent week! {{hugs}}

    1. Thank you Cathy.
      I am definitely doing all I can to heal.

  4. It's good to read your recovering and managing Colette, I haven't heard this before I liked it a lot :-)

    Have a recuperationtastic week :-)

  5. hoping for a quick recovery to you,may god bless you

    1. Thank you Randy.
      I am on the mend thank God.
      God bless you

  6. Colette, I don't actually know you, I just come to your site sometimes, but I had such a feeling of concern and tenderness for you from your post. This may sound complicated, but sometimes I feel a slightly coercive force as a Christian, that I MUST forgive. You have to avoid that too! It's hard. Be well!

    1. Hello Anna,
      Thank you.
      You do make a very good point. I've felt that too and talked about it and resist it.
      It was not taken well, but it must be done.
      Blessings to you.

  7. Sorry you are having a rough time. Hope you heal well. I know when a mom is sick its hard to do your normal things around the house so we just do the best we can. Look forward to the better days and try and keep our spirits alive.

    1. Thank you Ann.
      It sure does feel weird and awful to be laid up.
      But life does come in all phases right.

  8. Glad to hear you're recovering!

  9. This is a great piece about healing and forgiveness. I struggle with depression, so feeling broken and hurt can be a daily battle. I've found art to be an amazing outlet, even if it just means coloring a little. I wish you the best and a speedy recovery! <3

    1. Thank you for sharing Trippy Cusp.
      I'm glad you've found something that will help you along.
      Here's to moving forward bit by bit.

  10. Best wishes in your recovery in all aspects, physically, mentally and spiritually. This sure hits home for me right now....having trouble with forgiveness and my heart is so hard and broken. Thanks for sharing!

  11. I hope you are feeling better. Now that I'm a senior, I know many ppl who are totally taken over with anger, bitterness, revenge over things that have happened to them, some things truly terrible. I keep trying to catch myself I don't want to end up that bitter, no happiness whatsoever, even if the wrongs done you deserve to feel that way.

  12. I have to love the very first comment "Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self." I have a bi-polar condition, and writing tremendously (sometimes 18 hours straight) saw me through until I got help many years later...I never even tried to publish

  13. Praying you have a quick recovery! God bless you <3

    Edye //

  14. Very helpful article sometimes we do forget the right things.

  15. Good for you. :) Thanks for sharing!! 😉☺

  16. Great thoughts on forgiveness and I'm praying for your healing.

  17. Hope you'll have a quick recovery, stay strong!

  18. these our great thoughts and a very informative post thanks for sharing

  19. These thoughts are very inspiring and I hope you recover quickly.

  20. Hope you have a speedy recovery. Best wishes.


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